These compelling case histories meld science and storytelling to
illuminate the complex relationship between the mind of someone with
dementia and the mind of the person caring for them.
"This book will forever change the way we see people with dementia
disorders--and the people who care for them."--Lori Gottlieb, author of
Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
After getting a master's degree in clinical psychology, Dasha Kiper
became the live-in caregiver for a Holocaust survivor with Alzheimer's
disease. For a year, she endured the emotional strain of looking after a
person whose condition disrupts the rules of time, order, and
continuity. Inspired by her own experience and her work counseling
caregivers in the subsequent decade, Kiper offers an entirely new way to
understand the symbiotic relationship between patients and those tending
to them. Her book is the first to examine how the workings of the
"healthy" brain prevent us from adapting to and truly understanding the
cognitively impaired one.
In these poignant but unsentimental stories of parents and children,
husbands and wives, Kiper explores the existential dilemmas created by
this disease: A man believes his wife is an impostor. A woman's
imaginary friendships drive a wedge between herself and her devoted
husband. Another woman's childhood trauma emerges to torment her son. A
man's sudden Catholic piety provokes his wife.
Why is taking care of a family member with dementia so difficult? Why do
caregivers succumb to behaviors--arguing, blaming, insisting, taking
symptoms personally--they know are counterproductive? Exploring the
healthy brain's intuitions and proclivities, Travelers to Unimaginable
Lands reveals the neurological obstacles to caregiving, enumerating not
only the terrible pressures the disease exerts on our closest
relationships but offering solace and perspective as well.
