Compiled from the notes of three zombie gnome experts (among them a
Van Helsing-like zombie gnome hunter, a horticulture student, and a
gardening columnist), this guide includes a detailed study of zombie
gnome habits, hiding places, and offensive tactics, as well as an
intimate history of the zombie gnome rise and eventual war with
humanity.
Empty-eyed, shambling, and hungry for human ankles, the zombie gnome
population is on the rise, infesting the backyards of suburbia and
attacking innocent lawn ornaments everywhere. While chances of human
survival are minimal, readers can arm themselves with TheZombie Gnome
Defense Guide to combat their tiny, undead enemies.
Offering strategies for defense against a zombie gnome invasion, the
book provides an extensive list of essential weapons and DIY
home-fortification tips. Rare illustrations of zombie gnomes in their
natural habitat and a priceless collection of never-before-seen photos
(housed in an envelope in the back of the book) make this the go-to
guide for survivalists in a zombie gnome-infested world.