The Burglar in the ClosetMass Market Paperbound, 25 April 2006

The thing about being a burglar is it's a secret best kept to yourself. You live safer, and the police have less chance of finding you out. Maybe you can tell a friend, but your dentist? Well, this is the awkward situation Bernie Rhodenbarr finds himself in, in The Burglar in the Closet. Like all great capers, it starts out complicated and goes downhill from there. At a routine teeth cleaning Bernie discovers a few things. One, he's got a nasty cavity. Two, his dentist is unhappily married. Three, his dentist knows Bernie's a burglar. Seems good old Dr. Sheldrake is in need of a burglar to steal back some valuable diamonds from his soon-to-be ex, Mrs. Sheldrake. Next thing Bernie realizes is his tooth feels better, and, prowling around Crystal Sheldrake's apartment for the goods, his head hurts. That's because someone just put a key in the lock and is coming through the door. With only one place to hide, Bernie slips into the closet, agonizing over the overly friendly sounds coming from Crystal's boudoir. Time passes, Bernie emerges, and there's the lovely Crystal Sheldrake - only she's not so lovely anymore - lying dead on the floor, a dental instrument to blame. To top it all off, the diamonds are gone. So too is Bernie, chasing a killer's shadow and evading the inquiring eyes of his nemesis, Detective Ray Kirschmann.