They go by many names: helicopter parents, hovercrafts, PFHs (Parents
from Hell). The news media is filled with stories of well-intentioned
parents going to ridiculous extremes to remove all obstacles from their
child's path to greatness . . . or at least to an ivy league school.
From cradle to college, they remain intimately enmeshed in their
children's lives, stifling their development and creating infantilized,
spoiled, immature adults unprepared to make the decisions necessary for
the real world. Or so the story goes.
Drawing on a wealth of eye-opening interviews with parents across the
country, Margaret K. Nelson cuts through the stereotypes and hyperbole
to examine the realities of what she terms "parenting out of control."
Situating this phenomenon within a broad sociological context, she finds
several striking explanations for why today's prosperous and
well-educated parents are unable to set realistic boundaries when it
comes to raising their children. Analyzing the goals and aspirations
parents have for their children as well as the strategies they use to
reach them, Nelson discovers fundamental differences among American
parenting styles that expose class fault lines, both within the elite
and between the elite and the middle and working classes.
Nelson goes on to explore the new ways technology shapes modern
parenting. From baby monitors to cell phones (often referred to as the
world's longest umbilical cord), to social networking sites, and even
GPS devices, parents have more tools at their disposal than ever before
to communicate with, supervise, and even spy on their children. These
play important and often surprising roles in the phenomenon of parenting
out of control. Yet the technologies parents choose, and those they
refuse to use, often seem counterintuitive. Nelson shows that these
choices make sense when viewed in the light of class expectations.
Today's parents are faced with unprecedented opportunities and dangers
for their children, and are evolving novel strategies to adapt to these
changes. Nelson's lucid and insightful work provides an authoritative
examination of what happens when these new strategies go too far.