What, you ask, is a Fred Fitch? Well, for one thing, Fred Fitch is the
man with the most extensive collection of fake receipts, phony bills of
sale, and counterfeit sweepstakes tickets in the Western hemisphere, and
possibly in the entire world. For another thing, Fred Fitch may be the
only New York City resident in the 20th century to buy a money machine.
When Barnum said, "There's one born every minute, and two to take him,"
he didn't know about Fred Fitch; when Fred Fitch was born, there were
two million to take him. Every itinerant grifter, hypester, bunk artist,
short-conner, amuser, shearer, short-changer, green-goods worker,
pennyweighter, ring dropper, and yentzer to hit New York City considers
his trip incomplete until he's also hit Fred Fitch. He's sort of the
con-man's version of Go: Pass Fred Fitch, collect 200 dollars, and move
on.
What happens to Fred Fitch when his long-lost Uncle Matt dies and leaves
Fred $300,000 shouldn't happen to the ball in a pinball machine. Fred
Fitch with $300,000 is like a mouse with a sack of catnip: He's likely
to attract the wrong kind of attention. Add to this the fact that Uncle
Matt was murdered, by person or persons unknown, and that someone now
seems determined to murder Fred as well, mix in two daffily charming
beauties of totally different types, and you have a perfect setup for
the busiest fictional hero since the well-known one-armed paperhanger.
As Fred Fitch careers across the New York City landscape-and sometimes
skyline-in his meetings with cops, con men, beautiful girls, and (maybe)
murderers, he takes on some of the loonier aspects of a Dante without a
Virgil. Take one part comedy and one part suspense and shake well-mostly
with laughter.
