Choosing a name is one of the first things expectant parents do. Thus,
David Narter has created Don't Name Your Baby: What's Wrong with Every
Name in the Book as a help to parents-to-be as they consider a name for
their newborn. Here at last is the book that recognizes that choosing
what not to name a baby is probably as important as choosing its name.
A name affects who a person will become -- a lousy name is almost always
the doorway to a lousy childhood. Parents should know their child will
be harassed, no matter what name is given, but they must also consider
the potential downside of the names they are pondering for their child.
Sample entries are:
-- Amy: Amy has such a cutesy, juvenile feel that most girls named Amy
never get promoted past third grade.
-- Andrea: Oh my God! Means "manly" in Greek.
-- Charles: Prince Charles has ruined this name for everyone.
-- Chrystal: You're going to name your baby after a shiny rock?
-- Harold: Most Harolds tend to marry women named Gladys. So until
Gladys picks up, you might want to stay away from this one or your boy
will be lonely.
-- Jesse: A name inextricably linked to America's most famous killer.
Good choice.
-- Jordan: You're naming your little girl after a 220-pound male
athlete!? Have you considered Butkus? Larry? Wilt? Kobie?
-- Tammy: There are some things from which a name can never recover, and
five pounds of eye-liner is one of them.
As an added benefit, Don't Name Your Baby provides lists of names for
ugly babies, babies who will be old before their time, dog names,
faddish names, names no one can live up to, names that guarantee your
child will get beat up at school, names for jobless babies, scented
names, and the ultimate list of steady, reliable names. A wonderful gift
for a friend.
